Est. 1968 |
Issue 333 |
We have learned from the public prosecutor's office that Mr Bruno W. was arrested yesterday on suspicion of copyright fraud. The defendant is accused of plagiarising the work of the renowned artist Psittacism68. During his arrest, he resisted violently and shouted ‘they are just parameters’. The interrogations are currently underway, and the judge has decided that the defendant must remain in custody.
Psittacism68 is a renowned multimedia artist whose best-known works include ‘Fractonaut’ and ‘Progressive Arithmomania’. An exhibition of his work is currently on display at the National Museum of Fractals.
Eucliditry by Psittacism68
If Bruno W. is found guilty, he faces a hefty fine and a lifetime ban from digital media. His lawyer told us that they will seek a reduced sentence on the grounds of mental health issues, as he has been diagnosed with schizophrenia and paranoia in the past. The accused's entourage has started a major petition to liberalise the use of numbers.
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Scientists working at the Institute of Natural Sciences have attributed the recently discovered fossils to a previously unknown species of dinosaur. Based on carbon analysis of the bones, it is believed that this herbivore existed in the late Triassic period.
A piece of preserved skin was also discovered that contained pigments with the ability to change colour. It is believed that this was a form of defence mechanism against predators, stunning them by displaying animated fractals. This could also indicate the unusual mating behaviour of this new species. The species was given the appropriate name ‘Fractalopicus’.
The Hungarian team that won the gold medal for their flame fractals during the previous Fractolympics was caught using banned substances. Traces of anabolic steroids and beta blockers were found in their urine samples. President Arbon reacted indignantly and accused the organisation of a conflict of interest.
The team was disqualified and the gold medal now goes to the Belgian team, which won silver at the games in Tuvalu 2024.
Tuvalu 2024
The next games will take place in Liechtenstein in the summer of 2036 and, in addition to the familiar Mandelbrot and Julia disciplines, the programme will now also include the Sierpiński and Koch competitions.
Several countries have already confirmed their attendance at this event, especially since it will be a jubilee edition. After the first time in Vatican City in 1916, this will be the 10th time that the wonderful world of fractals will be explored at the highest level.
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Recent scientific studies on the use of AI show that frequent use impairs users' cognitive abilities. This leads to reduced critical thinking and analytical skills. The phenomenon, known as ‘cognitive offloading’, leads to the disappearance of independent thinking and creativity.
When we asked ChatSHT for comment on this, we were told that this is entirely in line with the objectives of the original founders, who want despotic rulers to face little resistance. According to this AI, voting rights and democracy will disappear completely in the future and be replaced by fully artificial applications.
Apparently, the Chinese army is investigating whether fractal projections can be used for military purposes. The idea behind this is that viewing these beautiful graphic images has the same effect on humans as the use of psychotropic drugs such as MDMA or LSD. In this way, attempts are made to disillusion the enemy or to obscure their perceptions during combat.
Fractatank
At present, the first weapon is reportedly being developed with the aim of inducing a feeling of bliss in ground troops on a massive scale and depriving them of their fighting spirit. The experimental blueprints for the fractal tank are said to have already been completed. All these investigations are still strictly confidential, but several international intelligence services confirm these suspicions.
Several other major powers have already expressed interest should these weapons prove successful. Although we cannot confirm this news, it is assumed that some countries are already experimenting with hackers on a small scale.